Zorya Luhansk 0-2 Manchester United

Zorya Luhansk 0-2 Manchester United

We’re through. So, job done. This Europa League group campaign has confirmed my contempt for the early stages of this competition, but after finishing second in our pool to Fenerbahce, we can’t claim that we’re too big a club for UEFA’s second competition.

In a way it was fitting that such a weird group stage – two of our best performances of the season at home to Fener and Feyenoord, two of the worst away to those teams – ended in such a dull game. Honestly, it was like a pre-season game out there. Mind, it wasn’t helped by the rock hard surface, with temperatures of at times -7 degrees contributing to the poor play. The crowd in Odessa could be forgiven for falling asleep. A classic, it wasn’t.

The supporters were in good spirits though, because quite frankly it didn’t matter that the game was total crap. The fact that Zorya, a tiny club who were languishing in the third tier of Ukrainian football as recently as 2003, were hosting United was a huge moment for the club. It was done to death by the commentators but it needs repeating: This ‘home’ fixture was being played 600 miles from the city of Luhansk, with Eastern Ukraine still deep in conflict. So for the club exiled in sleepy Zaporizhia (the stadium there is not up to UEFA’s standards) a game against Pogba, Ibrahimovic and Rooney was a landmark, a real moment of triumph.

Spending time on matters such as this avoids mentioning the football, which was dreadful. Mourinho played the ‘A’ team (although Carrick, Valencia and Darmian were left at home) but the 1^st half passed by with us having the ball and doing nothing with it. Romero made a decent save at some point, shortly before a flare landed near him. Thankfully, the deadlock was broken soon after the break with a superb individual goal from Mkhitaryan, his first in a red shirt. A delicious nutmeg, calm finish. Zorya were pretty poor so there was never a chance of an equaliser, and it was duly wrapped up when Pogba played in Zlatan who finished simply. That made it 7 goals in 6 games in all competitions for the big Swede. At 35. Jeez he’s brilliant. Eric Bailly made his comeback and looked good, late clash of heads notwithstanding. Fosu Mensah had a decent cameo. And that’s it. Onto Spurs, when I’ll actually be there….

Community Shield - Manchester United 2-1 Leicester

Manchester United 2 (Lingard 32, Ibrahimovic 83) Leicester 1 (Vardy 52)

So, Jose Mourinho and Manchester United. Has a good ring to it, doesn’t it?

It’s always in my opinion a good thing to be in the Community Shield, (forever dubbed the traditional curtain-raiser for reasons yet to be discovered) acting as a friendly of the highest possible intensity against one of the best teams in the division. In these post Ferguson times, being in it meant something else – we had won a trophy! Cheers LVG.

Of course, the opponents being Leicester brought into sharp focus how we had underperformed recently, exactly why we were starting 2016/17 with a new boss. Jose Mourinho, no less. But the miracle of Leicester is still a wonderful story, and it would be intriguing to see how we would perform against a side who we drew twice with last year in incident packed games (The Vardy record, and then Fellaini and Huth’s bans).

Winning the shield wouldn't guarantee anything, (Moyes won it after all) but after a bunch of useless games halfway around the world, we would see in a semi-competitive environment how we were shaping up ahead of the long season. 

So back at Wembley, over 80,000 fans, time for United to show their teeth…. Sort of. It was a pretty poor game, and the opening exchanges were reminiscent of the early 2000’s Shields when it was quite evident that Fergie didn’t care. But the opening goal was superb, a brilliant mazy run past 3 players from Jesse Lingard, scoring his second amazing goal at Wembley for United in as many appearances. Lingard celebrated with an awful ‘dance’ but no matter. A great goal from a player deemed to be under pressure in the new regime against the champions? Quality.

Even worse celebration than the dab. Fix up Jesse

Fellaini, who will be presumably be very important in the early days of Mourinho’s United, decided it was all going a bit well and terribly under hit a back pass to play in Jamie Vardy who made it 1-1. We were under the cosh for a while, but new signing from Spain Eric Bailly was resolute at the back. Early days, but impressive. The most concerning thing was a unnecessary challenge from Huth on Lingard which saw him limp off. Fuck.

Lots of subs were made by both teams as the game –played in stifling heat for early August in the capital- seemed to be meandering towards a penalty shoot-out. The game had largely passed Zlatan Ibrahimovic by, the giant Swede not looking 100% match fit and his delicate touches and flicks not being read by his teammates. But as the press sharpened their knives, the man came good with a genuine world class moment. Valencia, probably United’s biggest threat all afternoon, beat his man and floated a cross to the far post, and Zlatan powered a header into the net, out jumping Morgan in the process. Magic. Leicester had probably lost about 9 headers or some shit in the entire season just gone, and here was Ibrahimovic showing what a world class striker can do. Brilliant.

There was still time for Mourinho to anger everyone when taking off Mata in the last minute after bringing him on before, under the flimsy argument that his new signing Henrik Mkhi-whatever could provide better defense from the expected barrage of long balls into the area in the dying seconds. I mean, he’s an inch or two taller but delicate no.10’s don’t tend to be the best at seeing out games. To be honest I don't care if Jose was just being a knob to Mata or just making it all about him, we won, and had a trophy (of sorts) and that’s what counts.

United (4-2-3-1) De Gea; Valencia, Bailly, Blind, Shaw (Rojo 69); Carrick (Herrera 61), Fellaini; Lingard (Mata 63 [Mkhi 89]), Rooney (Schneiderlin 88), Martial (Rashford 70); Ibrahimovic.

 

Love a trophy lift

The boy Rash holding the Shield