Man Utd 1-3 Crystal Palace

Manchester United 1-3 Crystal Palace (Van de Beek 80) (Townsend 7, Zaha 74 (pen), 85)

So here we go, 2020/2021. The start of the season is usually a time for hope, yet the prospect of empty stadiums for the foreseeable future has limited my excitement. If no one is there to watch it, did it really happen? Behind closed doors football is better than nothing though, and sure enough I was soon devouring the latest transfer news like everyone else. In any case, my eagerness for the football to return, or lack thereof, probably related more with my current displeasure with how Manchester United are run.

United started a week late after our involvement in Europe, and in that time the picture of the season ahead became clearer. Aubameyang and Grealish signed new deals with their clubs. Out of nowhere, Liverpool and Tottenham made transfer splashes with world superstars Thiago and Gareth Bale respectively; Diogo Jota and Sergio Regulion were mere footnotes. 

In this context it was more crucial than ever for United to make a good start, and so came the team news, with David De Gea preferred as expected to Dean Henderson. Paul Pogba, fresh from a positive Covid-19 test, partnered Scott McTominay in a double pivot, with Nemanja Matic not fit enough to make the squad. The right flank raised eyebrows, as a Fosu-Mensah and James combo was not the strongest available to the manager. Palace lined up in an attacking 4-4-2. A makeshift back four featured promising 21 year-old left-back Tyrick Mitchell (the beneficiary of Van Aanholt's injury in the last meeting between the sides) and a midfielder, Cheikhou Kouyate, in the centre. 

It was interesting to note pre-match that Mata, Pereira and Lingard, three players seen as exemplifying United's lack of quality options last season, were left out of the squad all together. While I've been critical of all three, you cannot with a straight face say that Ighalo is more worthy of a place in the 18 than them, and that's not even getting to the picking of Fosu-Mensah, a player whose loans at Palace and Fulham were mediocre at best. Nevertheless, the team must be given a chance, time to shut up and watch Ole's lot perform and stop my pessimism, right?

United weren't the team to watch in the first 20 minutes though. The visitors from South London fielded four players who can run at people in their 4-4-2, and pressed high. Straight away they targeted United's weak right hand side of James, McTominay and Fosu-Mensah. Only 5 minutes had gone before De Gea, unsettled by the press, passed straight to a Palace player who couldn't collect it properly. Pogba committed a couple of needless fouls to put us under pressure. It was a sign of things to come. 

The opening goal was astoundingly simple. Jeffrey Schlupp with a simple 3rd man run forward had caught out Fosu-Mensah who had been sucked in by the player coming short. Lindelof came across to cover far too slowly, and the ball came across the box to Andros Townsend who finished with Luke Shaw failing to track his run. Lindelof and Shaw, showing his new buzz cut, were at fault, guessing how the play was going to develop and not reading the danger. 

It was a horrible start but even worse was that United didn't respond, instead Palace carried on dominating. The home side were so sloppy, getting dispossessed regularly. Pogba in particular looked all at sea in the opening stages. Shaw was beaten easily but Townsend's daisy cutter went wide. On the 15 minute mark, Bruno Fernandes' horrible touch saw him robbed by Schlupp, and Wilfried Zaha led the first of what turned out to be many counters Palace had on the day. This one led to nothing, but in no time a poor back header by Lindelof required De Gea to sprint out of his goal to stop Zaha from having a shot. Palace looked hungry and full of running, United shocked by their aggression, embodied by Joel Ward, warrior-like in his desire to get blocks in.  

Gradually after 20 minutes or so the Red Devils got a foothold, getting moves going. After nice interplay, Rashford setup Pogba for a shot from the edge of the box, and Guaita made a good stop down to his right. Then McTominay curled wide from the inside left position after a sharp Bruno pass. But chances kept coming for Palace due to unforced errors. McTominay and Fosu-Mensah had a mix-up, however after a slick counter Townsend went for glory with a wild shot when Zaha was better positioned. 

Towards the end of the half United had almost nullified the Palace threat, and went in search of a goal. Palace, however, are marvellously coached by Roy Hodgson. While he named a positive team, the defensive fundamentals that are synonymous with his teams were clear as day. The shuffling across, the ability to cut out passing angles and organisation in general may not sound complex, but it requires painstaking attention to detail on the training ground to perfect. Remember it was a defence including a midfielder in Kouyate at centre-back. It is doubtful our manager makes a similar impression on his much better and valuable squad given the evidence of the tactical mess of the 2nd half. 

United were showing adequate movement for once, but the care in the pass was lacking. Even Anthony Martial's technique let him down, a dreadful touch ruining an attack and resulting in a free-kick for Palace, pressure released. The complacency after a quiet period for Palace kicked in, and it should have been 2-0 at half-time. Zaha led another break but Bruno, who always runs hard for the team, delayed him, leading to the ex-United winger moving it onto Jordan Ayew. The Ghanaian beat McTominay easily but De Gea made a top class save. From the resulting corner, after United half cleared the electric Zaha hit a tame effort wide, and the whistle blew. Phew.

James had seen more of the ball than Rashford and Martial. He had never beat his marker, always coming inside into traffic, the confidence gained from playing well for Wales nowhere to be seen. Mind, he wasn't helped by Fosu-Mensah who had never run beyond him; what does Ole see in him to pick him over Dalot? Palace might be disciplined, but without Matic holding the fort they knew we were vulnerable from counter attacks and thus pushed the front four forward. McTominay had shown some good stuff with his height and strength helping us keep the ball, but overall it was a tame performance from the Scot in the middle.

The manager made a sub at half-time, new no.11 Greenwood replacing James, but the second half started exactly the same as the first - Palace looking dangerous, United lax. McTominay lost out and Palace once again streaked away, Ayew shooting straight at De Gea. Pogba and Maguire sent simple balls straight to opposition. Our captain picked up a booking after Zaha, who had been coached by Solskjaer on loan at Cardiff, had beat him. It was relentless, Lindelof was looking so poor when he was exposed. 

United did improve, Pogba pinging some long passes as they changed strategy. On the hour came the big miss. Maguire switched to Fosu-Mensah, Rashford's run on the right gave him time to measure a cross onto Greenwood's head, but the boy wonder put it wide. His head ain't as clinical as his left. At the other end the ever impressive Zaha scored after the umpteenth break, but it was given correctly offside. Ole responded to this escape by bringing on Donny Van de Beek for his debut hooking Pogba. You couldn't argue with the sub, he was just too wasteful. 

Lindelof volleyed over from a very difficult chance after McTominay flicked on a corner, but Palace were still the team that looked more of a threat, attacking with pace against a back four clueless when they dropped back, the game would've been dead already if they had better forwards. McTominay wasn't able to give the defence any protection throughout the 2nd half. Once more they poured forward but Ayew didn't get proper contact on his shot. Or so I thought - VAR intervened to give a pen from this incident, for handball against Lindelof. Are. You. Kidding. Me. It was so quick, the Swede so close, but it's pointless moaning too much about VAR, something I was totally against from the beginning, as people like myself and Hodgson (who, to his credit, said it wasn't a pen after the match) seem to have lost the battle. 

Justice was done as De Gea stopped Ayew's relaxed pen, but the nerds stepped in again as our keeper was a few inches off the line, and Zaha sent the retake high into the net with a far better spot-kick. Palace completely deserved the 2-0 lead, but honestly, since when can you change the taker? De Gea's sarcastic applause summed it up. 

Van de Beek marked his debut with a goal, as for once Palace were at sixes and sevens at the back and the Dutchman calmly finished first time. On came Ighalo to pile on the pressure, but the hope didn't even last five minutes. Zaha, fired up after a little argument with Maguire following a heavy tackle, shrugged off the painfully weak Lindelof to arrow a shot into the corner, clinching the win and marking a virtuoso display. You couldn't argue with the result, United had been well beaten. Well done Palace, well done Zaha, well fucking done Man United. At no point did they look like they were going to even get a draw. They were lucky in fact that sub Eze was a bit selfish at the very end - the bench seems the right place for the talented young forward for now while he adjusts to the top flight. Countless blocked shots after running out of ideas mean nothing, and the final whistle came to our mercy, the players avoiding the inevitable boos that would've been ringing out in a full Old Trafford. That's two in a row for Palace at the biggest club stadium in England, the first time they've ever managed that.

The postmortem wasn't pretty. The much vaunted front 3 were held at bay easily. Greenwood made no impact at all. Martial started well enough, holding the ball up, a skill that doesn't always come easy to him. In the 2nd half though, he disappeared, and it was like playing with ten men. As for lockdown hero Rashford. he simply must offer more. He was on the periphery in every sense, and the first time he took on a defender was in the dying minutes on the right. The rest barely deserved comment. Ighalo, with all due respect, was never going to score. At least Van de Beek was impressive given the situation he arrived in, playing one touch, the Ajax style. 

We'll be better with everyone - especially Matic who was a huge miss - back and Ole mentioned the lack of break to the players. But due to his lack of rotation, we have many squad members who should be fresh - you can't say players like Bailly, Mata, Lingard, and Fred can't do a job against bloody Palace at home. A Palace side that hadn't scored more than twice in the whole of last season (The last time they did score 3 was against Cardiff in May 2019). It is galling that a side that has been put together for so much money struggles against a side who were without Dann, Van Aanholt, Tomkins and Cahill at the back. Hodgson worked with what he had to maximise the performance, and it was terrific. 

The young left back Mitchell was excellent, so quickly out to James, and then Greenwood, when they got the ball. Palace's holding pair were so good at closing the space, and McCarthy supported the four outlets at times too. Schlupp was a great pick in left midfield by Hodgson as up against our weak side he could attack 1 v 1, but was solid defensively as well. Townsend rolled back the years, driving with the ball from deep, working tirelessly to support his team and always reliable in the press. Ayew was asking questions of the defenders, if he was clinical, it could've been a rout. 

Nonetheless, it was all about Zaha. In the first half his maturity was on show, as he won fouls up the pitch, held it up and made the correct decisions in and out of possession. His tremendous stamina allowed him chances to run at defenders and always give Palace an outball, and his selfless attitude created chances for his teammates. He fully deserved the two goals against his former club which never gave him a proper chance and the ongoing professionalism he shows despite clearly wanting to leave is testament to both himself and Hodgson.

Signings are needed to challenge for the title, not to not lose 3-1 to Palace at home. Sancho would be lovely but his arrival would not change the fact that Ole is out of his depth. He never really gets the criticism either. United were in the end outplayed by a side featuring one player who gets into our team and yet again the press reacted to the loss by saying we don't have good enough players. It's mind-boggling. 

It's important not to be too reactionary after just one game; Palace were ready and match-fit, whereas United have essentially back-to-back seasons to deal with. Zaha was decisive in a way not many will match this season. This was a crazy game week in general, 44 goals scored (beating the goals record for a 20 team Premier League) and dodgy penalties awarded frequently. But my word, United have to improve fast. Transfers will be demanded by many, although a bit of coaching wouldn't go amiss. 

United (4-2-3-1) De Gea 7; Fosu-Mensah 4.5 (Ighalo 81, 5), Lindelof 3.5, Maguire 5.5, Shaw 4.5; McTominay 4, Pogba 5 (Van de Beek 67, 6.5); James 5 (Greenwood 46, 5), Fernandes 5.5, Rashford 4; Martial 4.

Palace (4-4-2) Guaita 7; Ward 7.5, Kouyate 7, Sakho 7.5, Mitchell 8; Townsend 8.5, McCarthy 7.5 (Milivojevic 88), McArthur 7, Schlupp 8 (Eze 75, 5.5); Ayew 7.5 (Batshuayi 81), Zaha 9.5.

Crystal Palace 2-3 Manchester United Monday 5th March

Crystal Palace 2-3 Manchester United (Townsend 11, Van Aanholt 48) (Smalling 55, Lukaku 76, Matic 90+1)

"I have never been involved in a comeback like that before , I used to watch them on TV" - Marcus Rashford on Twitter, the morning after the night before.

Football, eh? Bloody Hell. What a game, what a shitshow, what a stunning comeback, what a winning goal from Nemanja Matic. A rollercoaster of emotions, and at the very end, an outpouring of joy, and regaining our place in 2^nd ahead of the game against Liverpool next week.

It really shouldn’t be this hard, after all the investment. How can United swing so violently in competence from game to game? After Chelsea, everything felt positive. And yet, United spent most of Monday evening frantically trying to avoid disaster. The wonderful resilience shown by the players was heartening, but does not erase how woeful we were in the opening 70 minutes. Our best players were dogshit, but we had managed to win… why do we wait until we concede before trying hard to score?

Only one change was made from Chelsea, with hero from last week Jesse Lingard coming in for Martial, who didn’t travel due to a minor injury. Herrera, Fellaini, Rojo, Jones and Blind were still out. McTominay started again.

Those United fans were in quality form all evening, coming across loud and clear on Sky serenading Eric Cantona, much to the anger of the Selhurst Ultras. Although there was nothing to shout about in a shambolic first period which counts among the very worst since Mourinho took the job.

It is difficult to know where to start. The attitude was unrecognisable from the Chelsea game. The whole team were second to every loose ball, unconvincing in the tackle, way too relaxed in possession. With both wide players floating inside, there was no width. We were playing too deep, with no movement up top, a recipe for stodgy disaster. Simple long balls from Palace were causing us problems, and at the other end there were no platforms for attack, with slow passes not stretching a makeshift Palace back four, or testing the dodgy Wayne Hennessey.

We were behind soon enough, losing the ball easily to allow Christian Benteke to set up Andros Townsend to score from a deflection off Lindelof, who turned his back. It was deserved, and there was little reaction from United. Instead Palace went close to doubling their lead a few times before the half-time whistle with Benteke and Sorloth proving a real handful in the air.

Roy Hodgson – whose England work was always appreciated by me – had made his Palace team tough to beat and had improved them no end since their shocking start but he was left with one hand tied behind his back here with so many first teamers out injured. His star man Wilfried Zaha was the headline but there were numerous others who were unavailable: Dann, Sakho, Sako, Puncheon, Cabaye, Speroni, Ward, the United loanee Fosu-Mensah, Loftus-Cheek and long-term crock Wickham. Yet their organisation remained, set up in two banks of four to deny space and push the defensive line of the visitors back.

Sanchez was a disgrace in that first half, unable to do anything right. Continually he moved infield into traffic, hit heavy passes straight out of play, and mis-controlled passes, his touch deserting him. Not that he was alone. Valencia was static off the ball, afraid to do anything unsafe. McTominay barely touched the ball, and I would hazard a guess that the young lad was hiding on the toughest evening of his career so far. Pogba was the opposite, coming way too deep to start attacks, and unprepared and lackadaisical when he had possession. Matic looked weak and tired in the midfield. Young was just terrible. The 4-3-3 basically meant more players doing fuck all and one less game changer than usual.

 

Red Rom loves it.

Mourinho reacted to a pathetic first half by hauling off McTominay for Rashford, switching to 4-2-3-1. The young flier made an impact instantly testing the pace of the Palace defenders, wanting to isolate himself 1 on 1 with his markers. Pogba and Matic were finding him a lot in the opening moments of the second half, but no telling chance was created. That was mainly down to rookie Palace right-back Aaron Wan-Bissaka, who was my man of the match for his never-say-die attitude and his desire to put tackles and blocks in.

The best laid plans were in tatters as Palace scored another, and it was amateur hour again as we switched off from a free-kick that was quickly taken by Schlupp, playing the speedy Van Aanholt through. No one was going to catch him, and he lashed it past De Gea to send Selhurst Park into dreamland. The last time we had come back from 2-0 to win a league game was in December 2013 against Hull.

Two down, staring at the abyss, United finally punched back. A corner was cleared and from the resulting opportunity, Valencia carefully measured a cross from a central position onto Smalling’s head, with Tomkins suffering a brainfade by keeping him onside. Game on.

United took control of the game, helped by taking off Valencia and Young, who were both utterly hopeless, and bringing on Luke Shaw and Juan Mata, with Lingard pushed to right-back in an attacking move. It made sense, and Lingard had played at full-back against Bournemouth last season. As for Shaw, it was pleasing to see him enter the pitch in our hour of need, what with his form over Christmas and Young’s recent ineptitude. But he was definitely carrying a bit of timber. Or maybe he had about 4 layers on? It was a cold evening in South London, to be fair…

The next period of the game would’ve been enormously enjoyable for the neutral, although it was torturous for me. The game was completely stretched, with both teams frantic and full of panic. United were forcing things too quickly, rushing through moves and playing over ambitious passes. Palace dropped way too deep, terrified of the onslaught they knew were coming.

Without sounding like a know-it-all, in hindsight Palace had given so much already, and were so weakened by the absences, that them crumbling was inevitable. Constant defensive mistakes were made allowing United in, saved only by luck or last ditch tackles – like when Benteke of all people cleared off the line from Matic after a corner with the keeper beaten. Not that I could view the game with such clarity when it was going on, mind.

Mata was making a difference as he often does when United are having a bad game, his speed of thought, happy knack for finding gaps and calm demeanour was beginning to take effect and calm his teammates down. He always provided options, making himself available. Lingard at RB was a revelation; dribbling at the defence, pinning them back, allowing Mata ahead of him more space to come inside. Lukaku was winning more in the air, and deservedly put us on terms when reacting fastest to a Sanchez shot that had ricochet onto the bar after the best bit of interplay around the box all game had created the opening. He controlled and pretended to shoot about 4 times, having a clear picture in his head, allowing the defenders to crowd the keeper and block his vision. You don’t score as many as him without having composure in front of goal and the Belgian eventually stroked it home, leading the team in big celebration. We were now favourites.

But we needed Ge Dea, as per, to save us with an athletic save from a Benteke header that was improbable enough for the Belgian striker and one time Lukaku rival to already be off in celebration. Spanish Dave is just magnificent, and there is no more anyone can say. Really he deserves cunts in front of him who are actually capable of sticking with their markers.

However, despite all the trying, it looked like we had run out of time, with Palace squeezing every last drop of energy from all of their players, lactic acid burning in their arms as they blocked shot after shot and rose again and again to head crosses away. But in the 91^st minute after the umpteenth ball was blocked, the ball at up nicely for Matic about 30 yards from goal. The crowd, his teammates and yours truly were yelling at him to pass out wide but instead he unleashed an incredibly sweet half-volley into the top corner, sending the fans completely barmy in the process.



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What a fucking moment, what a comeback, what a way to score your first United goal. He can strike a ball (like vs Everton in 15/16, and in the Cup semi vs Spurs last April) but his shots for United have largely been erratic. For such a high-quality goal to be scored in those circumstances by Matic was simply orgasmic. He led a mass of United bodies who ran to the away end, celebrating intensely with the faithful. Magic from Matic. Scenes mate. Scenes.



The Reds regrouped to see off any Palace pressure and the final whistle came and the ground emptied remarkably quickly with the home team feeling sick after snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. Forgetting the wretched performance for a moment, that’s what football is all about, last minute winners from behind away from home. Great stuff. But now, onto the troubling post-mortem…

Sanchez was shocking throughout, but it must be said, as bad as he played, he never once gave up, always on the move, playing pretty much central midfield late on to try and get on the ball and create. Although, our big signing promptly fucked it up almost every time. Still, having a player who takes risks and keeps plugging away, keeps trying that chip through ball to the far post will surely be a good thing over time, but Jesus, it wouldn’t kill him to recycle it now and then. He simply must improve, get less wasteful and start justifying his enormous pay-packet soon, because United have looked muddled since he arrived. Everyone deserves a bedding-in period, but the crunch games are coming thick and fast and if he isn’t gelling with the rest of the team he should be starting games amongst the substitutes. Although like Pogba, he possesses the ability to come up with something special no matter how badly he’s playing.

Valencia and Young were both embarrassing, and that is not being unkind. They looked nervous and unconvincing in defence, and were insipid in attack. Remember these are wingers, of some repute, by trade. So you can forgive some defensive lapses – but how can they not provide something that causes a second string Palace team a problem? When you start with Lingard and Sanchez as the wingers, you know the full-backs must provide the width, and that might’ve been a mistake by the manager. Instead Valencia was barely over the halfway-line, and Young simply passed back to the receiver whenever he got it. Sure, they’re on the other side of their peaks, but there is little excuse for such a poor performance.

Of course, it needs to be said that the skipper Valencia has generally been very good for the last three years, against better judgement. He should be allowed off days, even if they are shockers (You knew he was bad when Jose took him off – he is usually one of his most trusted lieutenants). But clubs that we are competing against for honours probably wouldn’t tolerate a well past his best former winger at right-back. His obvious weaknesses don’t stack up well at all against Europe’s best. Given the importance of them in today’s game, perhaps Right-back is an area to strengthen in the summer. (I still love you Tony V, obvs.)

A left-back could be signed as well, although I would rather just give Luke Shaw a good run. The fact that the, ahem, heavy looking lad came on at all tells you everything about how bad Young was, especially when you consider Shaw has never been a favourite of Mourinho. Young has played above himself for long periods this season, even forcing himself back into the England squad, and he deserves kudos for that. But don’t get it twisted, he is nowhere near United standard in any position he plays. Consistently Young has been exposed positionally. He’s a survivor – I would’ve sold him in the summer of 2014. He’s a good character, big in the dressing room, a top guy and by all accounts a really good professional. But he’s just a bit shit, and the odd teasing cross won’t convince me otherwise.

Having said all of that though, it was a mighty fine comeback, demonstrating our spirit, and despite there being lots to dislike, the subs helped change the game and keep us on track. Mourinho made the right changes at the right time, and the lads turned it around. Well done, now try and not lose to Liverpool on Saturday.

United (4-3-3) De Gea 8; Valencia 3 (Mata 67, 7.5), Smalling 7, Lindelof 5.5, Young 3.5 (Shaw 67, 6); McTominay 5 (Rashford 46, 6.5), Matic 7, Pogba 6; Lingard 7, Lukaku 7.5, Sanchez 5.